I stand accused

Just when I thought I had my faith all figured, the Vatican has come up with a brand new list of unholy transgressions. Modern times bring with them modern sins and some revision is in order.

  1. Thou shalt not be extremely rich
  2. Thou shalt not be a drug peddler
  3. Thou shalt not engage in abortion
  4. Thou shalt not be a paedophile
  5. Thou shalt beware of genetic manipulation
  6. Thou shalt not engage in social injustices
  7. Thou shalt not pollute the earth

Sins 1-5 are way out of my league – at least for now. Who knows I may be extremely rich one day. But I may have some trouble with sin No: 7 which Wangari Maathai has already endorsed by asking everybody to repent by planting a tree.

If truth be told, chances of my planting a tree at the moment are next to nil.

Ok, nil.

But my bigger concern is that strictly speaking, even buying my favourite detergent (in a plastic wrap) and carrying it home (in a plastic bag) could earn me a one way ticket to the district of flames. That is before I use the detergent and pour poisonous chemical residue back to mother earth.

And by the way, considering that noise too is pollution, I don’t know what to make of those churches that pitch camp in the middle of residential areas, hook on their public address systems, and go ahead to give people noisy Sundays and sleepless nights. There must be a law against that, right?

Anyway, I’ve done a cold inspection of my sin-ometer so far and to be honest, I still often indulge in some of the original transgressions. For one I don’t always keep the Sabbath. I’m also guilty of stealing employer time to browse and lying that I’m doing research on the net. I often use the Lord’s name in vain to express shock even when I’m not shocked. ‘Oh my God!’ Ngai fafa! You most likely are guilty of that one too.

And as much as I do not covet my neighbour’s sheep and donkeys, once in a while I look longingly at their property. I’m not clear when things shift from innocent admiration to sinful coveting though.

I may be guilty of social injustices (Sin 6) but at least not to the extent of the likes of Kivuitu and some goons in parliament who recently plunged the country into chaos. But then again there’s no small and big sin.

Have a sinless day.

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