Here. Drink This. Its Algae.

Hail the power of marketers. The other day I got convinced to buy Algae and Chlorophyll supplements.

I’ll be the first to admit that I need less convincing to eat an artery clogger here and there than I need to pop supplement pills. But I do pop them every once in a while.

One, because I believe there’s something more than hype there. I’d like to firmly hold on to the hope that someone did not just pack hogwash and ship it for exorbitant sale worldwide. I still believe in humanity you see. Yes, the same humanity that put melamine in baby formula.

Two, because the scare mongering sessions are intense. You get told in graphic detail how your system is wrecking havoc unto self right that minute. You feel the free radicals grow tentacles and crawl menacingly in your body, and an urgent urge to purge them. You get convinced that you’re that tired, not because you’re unfit, not because you’ve put in a full day at work and then some, but because you have abused your body with wrong food and it has gone whack on you.

Of course it may all be true.

Then you’re presented with  a solution. A few pills, tonics and high fibre cereal fortified with even more algae, calcium and soybean and voila! A sparkling colon and the resultant bouncy health and crystal clear skin. Porcelain much? That is if I can call it cereal. Like weetabix right? Wrong. It mixes into a slimy goo which I’ll live at that.

Usually I stick to vitamins, minerals and especially omega oils which I’ve taken since I was age zero. (Read Seven Seas cod liver oil). I prefer pills and shakes to foul-tasting oils and tonics. Therefore, I’ve never bought Chlorophyll or Algae.

As for these, my sales rep battered me with a 100 words a minute tirade to a point where in utter exhaustion, I asked her to just bring whatever it was she was selling. And that’s how I ended up with enough to run a fish pond. Except they were for human consumption. My consumption.

Goo or no goo I shall consume the whole lot. Eventually.

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